To Move In Before Marriage Or Not…?

Lmaoooo okay so I just watched an NdaniRealTalk video <I love ndani btw!> and the topic is To Move In Before Marriage or not

I just felt to kinda share my thoughts on the issue. I swear I sometimes ask myself this question and what I would do when in that situation but I never really come to a conclusion, I end up weighing the pros and cons and it always ends there. So now, I’ll like if you guys actually help me by dropping comments on what you think. Okay here’s my view on it:

When it comes to marriage that’s some deep stuff as we all know and to be honest it is always safe to know your “better half” through and through before saying “Yes” or even popping the question. When it comes to moving in, I feel it’s fine to move in with someone you can actually see a future with and sweetheart I’m not talking about your boo of 3-6 months or even a year <I still feel thats short> cause that relationship can still end any time <sorry to burst your bubble but it’s true>. Here, I’m talking about if you’ve been with someone for about 3-4 years this can still end <sadly> but chances are quite low.

You see the problem I have with waiting till after the wedding to live together is that you don’t really get to see those habits he/she has when they’re “packaging” <aka forming> for you. For example, I not exactly a fan of snoring <I can legit stay awake cause of this> and sleep talking <this just cracks me up but some people can be scary> but anyways imagine if hubby snores and I just get to find out < the intensity> on my wedding night bruh it won’t be funny. No one wants some nasal symphony surprise on their wedding night or do you? Not especially when you’re not used to the pitch and tone. That’s how you’ll get into one silly ass argument like “Ayyyy! Don’t complain about my stew when all you can do is snore for Africa” <unlooks>. As stupid and random as it sounds that’s how some couples actually start “beefing” <lol this word is funny>.

But you see when you two spend time maybe about a year and a half before wedding then you guys get to know little things like who wakes up earlier, who’s more security conscious, who checks that the lights are off, who snores more or louder <I know they’re random but you get me yeah?> These little things matter especially at the start of your married life cause from what I’ve heard the first year a marriage can be quite bumpy. This is probably due to getting used to your spouse being around 24/7, now he sees you with the hair net before bed and in the morning, you can’t easily pull of the “I woke up flawless” shit cause it’s not everyday you’ll have the energy to sneak out of bed to apply your “no make up make up”, your eyebrows are totally off the fleek radius. Basically, you start letting go of all your insecurities slowly. These examples are based on physical stuff but obviously since you guys didn’t get married based on just the physical level don’t take my examples too seriously, there are other stuff like not being tidy or failing to do the dishes in time, stuff like that could piss off the other a bit.

On the other hand <moving in after the wedding> I guess there must be some type of good feeling of finally getting to live with your spouse. This isn’t even regarding anything sexual now, I’m just talking about having that alone time with babe, no family, no outing just the company of each other. I suppose the main reason most people choose not to live together before the wedding is to “reduce”/avoid any sexual tension probably due to religious or cultural beliefs which makes sense as well as holding on to respect.

This is what I’ve got with regards to this topic anyway!  Please feel free to leave comments on what you think. Bye ^^

 

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2 thoughts on “To Move In Before Marriage Or Not…?

  1. Eventhough it’s great to know someone’s bad habits before spending the rest of your life with them, you’re not going to break up with them because of their bad habits, besides you have your own. Also, the love between you is meant to be unconditional- not based on how perfect they are/ what they do. You’re both meant to work on your rough edges while helping the other person to become better too. You also need to be very accepting in a marriage.
    So at the end of the day, I don’t see the point in moving in with the person. Since you should love them with their faults (except if they’re a criminal lol). Besides, there will always be something new to learn about your partner; you’re not going to learn everything by living with them for a year or so. People can also change at any time so if your partner decides to start acting mentally unstable after you get married, your moving in with him/her has helped you achieve what?

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    1. This absolutely makes sense. There are obviously two sides to this “argument” and its all based on the individual. A friend of mine said she feels when you move in with a guy he starts to feel like he “owns” you already and that shouldn’t be until marriage, basically she feels there’s more respects in not moving in until after the wedding.

      Like

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